Make any dream into reality for yourself. (the ultimate “aha” moment episode)

Are you ready to finally bridge the gap between what’s on your vision board and your day to day reality?

I think most of us have gotten pretty good at setting big goals.  But how do we get from here to there?  How do we believe in ourselves and our ability to reach that goal enough to actually get there?

Mindi is here today teaching us how to cut and paste our “of course” energy and use mental rehearsal to rewire our brain and finally bridge that gap, and step into the life on our vision board.

So many pivotal aha moments on the podcast today that you are going to be able to use in your life to make any dream, any outcome reality for yourself.

I can’t wait to share this one with you – let’s get into it!

Resources from Mindi:

Free Guided Mental Rehearsal Meditation - HERE

Social Media Links 

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https://www.instagram.com/mindihuebner/
https://www.facebook.com/mindihuebnermindsetmasterycoach
https://www.linkedin.com/in/mindihuebner/

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Transcript

Kristy:  MindI Huebner is an intuitive mindset mastery coach, a certified NLP practitioner, health, life, and success coach, and clinical hypnotherapist. And Mindy knows rewiring your brain is the key to unlocking your magic so that you can create a soul aligned business and [00:01:00] extraordinary life. I love that extraordinary life.

How are you doing, Mindi? Thanks for coming on the podcast with. 

Mindi: I am so well today. Thank you so much. I, I'm honored to be a guest, so thank you for allowing me to be a part of your community. Oh, I'm really excited for, for the topic that we're gonna cover because I think this is gonna help absolutely everyone on some level that's listening.

And it's not often that you have a topic that, that will do that. So, so thanks for being here. Now, I just gave a very brief introduction on what you do, but I would love to hear a bit more about your story and then what it is that you're doing. Absolutely. I was in direct sales for about 17 years. I led a large successful team, was a top personal seller year after year, after year.

It was a good gig, let's just put it that way. It was, it was good. I earned free trips, all kinds of things. So I have taught, coached, mentored my entire adult. Because I did that for a really long time, and before that as well, I was, [00:02:00] we called it teaching and training, however I was coaching as well, and guidance, all those things.

So in 2015, I believe seems like a lifetime ago now my company closed my division. And so I was at this beautiful, truly beautiful crossroads of now what, what next? And I realized, I had an extremely successful business and I was really tired. I was burnt out and I was able to see that that was because of the way I was operating, which came out of my beliefs, specifically the belief that rest is lazy.

Once I realized, had that epiphany about limiting beliefs, how our. Limit us from having an extraordinary life in a solo aligned business that began the journey, the rabbit hole, the beautiful rabbit hole of habits and how the brain works, and [00:03:00] neuroscience and nlp and all the things. That was the very beginning of it, realizing that this one belief was creating the container for me to show up successful and exhausted, and I knew there had to be a better way than.

That's amazing. So now you're doing basically all coaching. Now you have My baby is a unlimited laser coaching program, which is a year long container where my clients get unlimited 20 minute sessions with me. Two. Breakthrough, a limiting belief to create a plan of action about how you wanna show up to next level your business.

Typically, the clients that come to me are established successful women in business. They're not, they're not newbies. They're not trying to figure out the groundwork. They are making six figures, seven figures, and they're realizing. My business doesn't serve me first. It's not sole aligned. I'm doing things that don't wanna be doing, and I haven't [00:04:00] figured out how to stop doing them yet, because I'm afraid that if I stop showing up in this way, I won't get the results that I want.

we so often end up there, you know, we, we've talked about this a couple times recently, that when we start out, we think, well, as long as it's successful mm-hmm. , everything will be good. Right? It doesn't matter if I don't really like the hours that I'm working, or I don't, not really passionate about the thing that I'm doing, it'll be fine.

And then you get there and you go, okay, you know what? This is great, but it's not fine. This isn't, this isn't where I wanna be. I wish we all knew when we first started out that we could build it the. That we wanna live. We just always seem to figure that out later. So I'm, I'm really excited about this.

Now we're gonna talk a lot about we're gonna talk a lot about rewiring the brain. Mm-hmm. , but before we do that, for anybody that's not familiar with the term, can you explain what NLP is for us? Yes. It's neurolinguistic programming and a really simplified, and one of my favorite sort of two part [00:05:00] definitions is it's the study of excellence.

And the study of patterns of excellence. And so you get to recognize excellence in others in things to call that in for yourself. And you get to see the patterns of excellence and success and step into those for yourself. So it's a way of representing to your brain through words and, and different strategies techniques of shifting into.

Believing in your limitlessness is, is the way I like to describe it. Okay. I like that. And you know, we hear so much, so much lately about mindset and how it relates to different aspects of your life, like money, mindset, success, mindset. But I think for a lot of people it's a really nebulous term. It's like, how do you, where do you, how do you harness this?

So I love it when we can connect it to science a little bit for my brain anyway, that makes it a lot easier to kind of understand and apply it. so can you explain kinda how the brain works so that this makes sense. [00:06:00] Yes. So our brain deletes, distorts and generalizes based on our beliefs. And you can see this showing up in your life all over when you just take a look at it.

So if you are believing something, empowering about yourself I'm a good time manager. I take good care of my family. I close. 80% of my sales calls, whatever that is, right? You're believing in an empowering way. You can see the proof of that in your life because not only does your brain delete, distort, and generalize based on your belief, it also you think a thought habitually over and over again.

It becomes an I am statement a, a belief I am an amazing closer, I am a human who. insert empowered thing, you then create habits to prove it to yourself. Mm. So you'll be able to see it in your life in empowered ways. You'll also be able to see it in disempowered ways, if it's become a [00:07:00] habit and now an identity.

And we're gonna talk about identity cuz that's where the magic is. If it's become a habit to say. I'm overwhelmed. I'm overwhelmed. I'm overwhelmed. It then becomes an an I am. And the words we say after I am are some of the most powerful words in the universe. So I am overwhelmed and you're always winning the game you're playing.

So now the game you're playing is disempowering and you're proving it to yourself everywhere because you're deleting, distorting and generalizing based on your belief. Wow. Okay. . I just had all sorts of epiphany moments of my own right. I everyone did like the, the mic dropped everywhere across the world, right?

Like, Oh, wait, hang on. What , you know, I have to tell you, we just had this I'll tell you the one that popped into my head. My son was recently diagnosed with adhd. So we, we did this little quiz in a, in a workbook that we have to see what were his high skills and what were his lower skills so that we can, and then what mine were so that we can figure out how we best work together and what I can help him with [00:08:00] and what I'm probably not gonna be able to help him with because it's one of my low skills as well.

And it turned out that my, one of my low skills was organiz. And I, it was like tearing out a little bit of my, honestly, I kept saying, I said, this is like an identity that I've held since, if you look at any job application from the time I was, you know, 18 years old and up, highly organized, highly organized , and I started to realize, I am not highly organized.

I'm a planner. You know, I love the planning. I love the, but I'm not, and it was like tearing out a little bit of my soul. It really hurt to realize that that was not in fact the case. But I think because I've been telling myself that for so many years and I believed it, I probably functioned higher than I would've otherwise.

Does that make sense? You also, you also were for the meaning that you made for organized, cuz here's another thing that we do. You made organized mean a planner and a this and a that, right? So yeah, you were all those things , [00:09:00] when the meaning of organized shifted to some other person's construct in order to support your.

That's where you realize. So here, that was a perfect segue. We're gonna, we're gonna like hop off the road and hop back on for just a second. Because the meaning that we give something and the identity that we embrace, those things get to expand and grow to serve us when an identity limits. It's no longer serving us.

So, perfect example. Several years ago I identified as a runner, I am a runner. This is like you an organization. I am a runner, and this is, it's at the core of my being and I, I all the things that come with being a runner. I love seeing other runners and getting new running shit, right? All the things that make me a runner.

And then I got injured and I couldn't run. [00:10:00] And I honestly was devastated. Yeah. Not for long, but long enough. And then I started realizing, wait a minute, I, I still am a runner. I can't run at this moment. And what is it about being a runner that lights me up so much? Well, I'm a woman who loves to move her body in a way that makes her feel strong.

So runner just expanded. I am a woman who loves to move her body in a way that makes me feel strong. And one of the ways I get to do that is running and I've recovered and so I can run again. And I've found all these other ways. To be a woman who loves her body by moving it to make it feel strong.

And so my identity, instead of limiting me and closing doors and my brain deleting, distorting and generalizing based on the belief that what I can't do anymore, what I'm incapable of, I shifted it to now expand, show that [00:11:00] my brain would then see all the other possibilities that were available. So 

by 

Mindi: identifying what the actual core of that was, that that made you love that identity?

Yes. Nice. Yes. Oh, I love that. That was something that I realized could make the difference when I got deeper into it. Why do I love being a runner? Why, why, why? And then I got to, well, what I really love is this, and this is just one, one road. So you, you talk about how we can use the way our brain works as a superpower.

So is this, this is what we're talking about. This is part of it, as well as identifying where you are. Believing, thinking, feeling, and showing up in a disempowered way to know that you are so powerful. You think a thought over and over again. It becomes a belief, and then you create habits to prove it. So if you find yourself in the, I am overwhelmed, and you look around, you're like, [00:12:00] yep, I sure am.

And my calendar proves it and my pile of dirty laundry proves it and my, you know, messed up books prove it. Like whatever. Right? My chaos proves it. Okay. What's a more empowering belief that you can start stepping into? Cuz here's the other thing. Your brain loves habits. So now, even if you don't like, want to be that overwhelmed, Your brain doesn't know the difference between a habit that serves you in a habit that doesn't.

So it's going to cue you to be the overwhelmed human because you're that powerful. You get to start shifting, rewiring the brain, and we can start with neutral. So this is where affirmations can come in. And this isn't toxic positivity or any of that kind of stuff. This is you retraining your brain. This is where affirmations can come in from us.

So if you're consistently saying, I'm overwhelmed, well one. What would you like to feel instead? [00:13:00] like, let's get real clear contrast shows us what we want and what we don't want. So we, we like contrast. We get to welcome contrast cuz it reminds us that we get to have more, or we're feeling really good.

Right. So I'm overwhelmed. Well, how would I like to feel? Well, ultimately I'd like to feel super organized doing control. Okay. How whatever the opposite of overwhelm looks like for someone. Well, most people's brains won't go. I'm super organized and in control. Yep. Here I am showing up like that. Like, like everything in us is going wire.

Like no, you're not. Now there are a segment of the population that actually can do that. I, and I've met some of them and there are times when I can make a really big leap too. Most of the time we're stair stepping. The beauty of this allows us to embody the new identity step by step and cast votes towards, we get to cast votes towards the version of us that is, I don't even know what I said, super organized and whatever else it was

 [00:14:00] So where could be a more neutral place that we get to go from overwhelm to two. I'm becoming a woman who finds pockets of ease in my day. I'm a human who can see planning capability. Like we get to just start training our brain to cast votes towards, cause if we don't know how to cast a vote towards being super organized and on top of everything, what can we cast a vote towards?

Little get us there. Like if we're not her. Well, one thing I could do to be her is I could, and this is really like simple, I could fold the laundry and not leave it in the dryer and put it away. This is me casting a vote towards that way less overwhelmed woman, cuz I'm checking off an item, I'm closing a loop.

So we get to stairstep those in whatever that is. So how do we recognize what, [00:15:00] what's stopping us, what we should be changing? Cuz this is something, and I struggle with this and I know a lot of people that do, you know, you say, okay, I, I know there's, there's obviously blocks, there's mindset issues. But being the person that's experienced them, it's hard to identify what those actual blocks are and what's stopping us.

So when you find yourself in a situation that, you know, I'm stuck. I'm this, I'm that, I dunno what to do to move forward. Two of my favorite questions are, who am I being, who do I want to be? Cause the, the moment you answer yourself, like, who do I want to be, then you can start to reverse engineer to see where the gap is in how you're not showing up to be her.

And the first place it's gonna be is in your, in your thought. In what you believe possible for yourself. Okay. Can we do an example of that just to illustrate? so I just had a call with a client who re wants to be in a hundred [00:16:00] percent integrity with herself in regards to her health.

Who am I being when I am skipping my water? That I've said is part of me being the woman who is a hundred. in integrity with her health. Or if I say I wanna be a woman who's in a hundred percent integrity with her health, where am I noticing pieces that aren't allowing me to be there? Right? I, I'm staying up until midnight doom scrolling on my phone, right?

Like this is then setting me up for less than success the next day. And it'll be difficult to stay in integrity with my health cuz I'll be drinking more coffee or I'll, whatever it is, right? So we just get to start. You will, you will feel into it. You'll see where you are stopping yourself when you say, okay, wait a minute, who am I being?

Who do I wanna be? Am I being the human I wanna be right now when [00:17:00] I. Saying I can't do this, or This is impossible for me, or I can't see how, you won't see how when you're not believing that you can be that person either. The how we we we say forget the how for now. Actually, we say it much more explicitly than that.

However, we say, forget the how for now. And let's cast the vision of what it's gonna see, like and taste like, and smell like, and feel like internally and externally so that we can start casting those little votes to that greater vision of us. And the next thing we know we're her, or we're him, or we're that human.

 Mental rehearsal is something that you talk about. Can you kinda explain for us what that is and then what it does when we use it? Yes. Yes. So only use mental rehearsal if you want to have Olympic gold medal level results. This is who uses mental rehearsal.

Yeah. [00:18:00] Olympic athletes. Top musicians. Top performers, top sports athlete like this is who uses mental rehearsal and myself and other very successful humans. Mental rehearsal is first. The very first thing that we need in it is a well formed outcome. So in nlp, we speak in outcomes, not goals. Goals are good.

They're an aim, they're a direction, they're a purpose. They're a way that we can line the path. Outcomes are what actually. Outcomes are the results. So we can set goals and not get them plenty of times. However, we're always getting an outcome. So how about if we start showing up in the outcome that we want instead, it's a little more tangible.

So having a well formed outcome. And here we'll go back to the water cuz this is a really easy one. So my well formed outcome is I'm a person who drinks eight, eight ounce glasses of water a day like I'm [00:19:00] hydrated. I have this outcome and I get to ask myself what's important about this outcome? Why?

Anytime we're talking outcomes, goals of moving forward direction, we get to ask why? Why? Well, because I know personally, like number one, hydrated women rule the world. Number two, hydration is really good for my skin. It's good for my focus, it's good for my productivity. My body doesn't create water except for the water I put in it.

It's good for my joints. It's, it's good if there's nothing bad about it for me when I become hydrated. So I wanna be, my well formed outcome is getting an eight, eight ounce glasses of water a day when we mentally rehearse from a well formed outcome, an outcome that serves us, and I'll come, that moves us forward.

An outcome that we wanna show up in 100%. When we do it that way, we're doing a couple things by mentally rehearsing. Number one, your brain doesn't know the difference between real and imagined. It literally does not know. So when I mentally rehearse myself going throughout [00:20:00] my day, being hydrated, drinking the water, and I get to the end of the day after I've done that, my brain's like, So when I actually show up and it goes, oh, we've been here before.

It takes some of the stress out of it. It adds a little more ease into it. It's practicing here so that we can cast the vision by drinking the water. So how would we do a mental rehearsal of eight day ounce glasses of water a day? Okay, well the first thing I'm gonna do, I'm gonna see myself waking up in the morning.

And first thing I'm gonna do is grab a big old glass of water and then it's gonna be a little bit longer in the day and the timer's gonna go off on my, or the reminder on my phone and it's gonna say, Hey, gorgeous, did you drink your water? Right? And then there's gonna be sticky note on my laptop, and I'm gonna see this hot pink sticky note that says hydrate, right?

Like, And, and, and, and I'm gonna see a really fun, I don't have to drink out of a really fun glass cuz I love water. But maybe you wanna drink out of a really fun glass and have more than one or a [00:21:00] great water bottle that holds all your water for the day so you know when it's done, it's done right. You get to see yourself showing up in this result over and over and over again.

And it's the end of the day now, and I've did my little tally mark on all my glasses of water for the day. And my feet are kicked up and I'm thinking about how awesome it is that I showed up for myself all day long. I got all the benefits of hydration. I'm the woman who, cause if I can do this, I can do anything.

Right? And that's, the outcomes are beautiful. They're milestones on our path to becoming, to consistently and continually embodying the identity of the woman who or the human. Oh, and you know, the, the, the, the practical planner in me loves this because you also have the opportunity while you're mentally rehearsing this to see all the obstacles, remove the [00:22:00] obstacles, give yourself, you know, you, oh, you know what?

Post-it notes would be good. So you do post-it notes the debt next day, or you get the fun water bottle, or you, you really set yourself up for success that way. We do that a lot with them. I used to do public speaking. And when we talk about training new speakers, that's one of the things is going through the entire talk from, from when they walk on stage to when they do the presentation, to when they walk off.

Because you, you figure out all those little road bumps along the way and it builds your confidence. yes, and here's the next part of that. Lots of times things don't go exactly as we plan them, cuz in our head we plan them perfectly. Right? Yes. So next level mental rehearsal is being able to see detours.

Like you said, that even when there's a detour, I'm still getting to the end of the talk. And everyone's inspired and it's still a standing ovation and, and, and I'm still getting to the end of the day and I've gotten all my water in. I'm still getting to the end of this podcast interview, and it's the most downloaded [00:23:00] episode, and everyone had all these mic drop moments and nuggets that they're implementing and moving forward with, right?

Even if there's technical difficulties, even if the beauty of mental rehearsal is I am showing up as the human who creates this outcome no matter what I've got. I've got this, and that is what we get to do for ourselves. And it again, it, since the brain doesn't know real and imagined we're taking some of the stress out, we're adding a little ease in to creating this new way of being and this new outcome for ourselves.

Now there is, there is some secret sauce, wanna share. The secret sauce is getting in our, of course, energy. This is just like the, we're here with our belief. I'm broke, I'm a millionaire. Most of us. Like, wow, that's not quite there yet, right? Let's be a 50,000 air first, right? So let's get in our, of course, energy prefacing this with, please do not overthink this.

This is really, really simple to get in your, of course energy. [00:24:00] Of course energy is. Any energy that you consistently show up in, it does not have to be daily. It can be something that you do weekly. That's, of course, it's empowered and you do it without thinking, so it gets to be as simple as. Literally. The second thing I do when I wake up in the morning is brush my teeth.

This is of course energy, hands down. It's good for me. I like showing up in it. I get all kinds of benefits from it, and it's who I am. I am a human who brushes their teeth way more than one time a day, but that is the first time during the day, right? This is my, of course, energy. So saying that, can you think of some empowered, moving forward, of course energy that you, that you can tap into and it might be.

Kissing your son goodnight. He might not be that little. It might be saying goodnight. Goodnight buddy. Right? Like patting him on the head. Whatever high fiving him. It might be if you have a pet walking your pet, it might be sending that text to whoever you text every day or once a week to say[00:25:00] you know, like, I'm thinking about you.

It doesn't have to get complicated. It's a, of course I'm doing this cuz this is who I am. Energy. Does that make sense? Yeah. So what do we do with that? Like if we have that? Yeah. Okay, good. Okay. You've got your of course energy. Everybody's got their of course energy. I want you to sit in it for a minute.

So close your eyes. Breathe it in. Feel that way of being. Of course I am this way. This is not wanting, having or wishing or hoping energy. This is done energy. This is I am. This is me Now. We're gonna take that energy and we're gonna copy and paste it onto our mental rehearsal so that we're already showing up in our, of course.

This is the having energy, not the wanting. See, wanting and wishing and hoping is disbelief. And it's up here I hope. I wish. But if we tap into our, of course, energy where we already know that, of course [00:26:00] we show up in the having energy and then do our mental rehearsal. Now we've put the secret sauce on it.

Ah, powerful. I have something on my list to do tonight, . I love it. So before we wrap up, I've got a couple of questions that I wanna ask you. I'm gonna ask you about your best piece of advice for women entrepreneurs. But before we do that, I also wanna know one thing, if we have number one thing that we can do to become the, the confident, wildly successful version of ourselves, what would.

Definitely asking who am I being and who do I want to be? If you haven't articulated it to yourself, it's very difficult to show up in it, and it's very difficult to start moving towards embodying it. The moment you can articulate it to yourself, and maybe you can't see the whole vision, but you can see part of the vision.

So cast the vision as far as you can. So that [00:27:00] you can reverse engineer and start showing up today. So who am I being and who do I want to be? And, and there's no room for shame or guilt here either. I, I wanna say that for everyone listening, this is about curiosity and about stepping into the possibility of it.

It's not what you should have done. We're not feeling guilty for not showing up in a certain way, none of that. This is about moving forward. I'm gonna cast as much of the vision as I can, and I'm going to embody it as much as I can. And so if I ask myself, who am I being and who do I want to be? And they're not in alignment, I'm not shaming myself.

I'm sitting in it for a minute and saying, what's stopping me from being who I want to be? And maybe me, then I wanna sit here for a minute. I'm sad, or I'm mad, or I'm off. Or I need a nap. Then revisit, who am I being, who do I want to be? [00:28:00] Well, I wanna be her and I already know a different thought. I can think a different thing.

I can do a different pattern to create and or interrupt. And you just start opening up cuz you're changing your filter, changing what you believe, what's getting deleted, distorted and general. Amazing. So what would your one piece of advice be? And it does, it could be related to mindset, it could be something you've learned on your journey.

You've been an entrepreneur for a long time, that you would wanna share with a, a newer woman entrepreneur to help her on her way. Yeah. I am going to invite you to get really curious about the words that you use, because, Are containers, they either give you energy or they take it away. Right? They, they either contain empowering energy or disempowering energy.

And, and so my one piece of advice would be to start doing some word swaps and checking. Checking where you're allowing, without even knowing [00:29:00] it, your energy to just leak out. And those words would look like, but, Ditching butt and bringing in and just that swap alone when we say, but, oh, I totally agree with you, Christy Butt.

Mm. Did I really agree with you? Did I stop what was before it? That was a really great idea, Christie, but now if we release, but, and occasionally there's a well placed, but Right. Sometimes we need a big old, but, and we get to be super intentional about it. If we said, and instead. That was an amazing idea, Christie.

And here's what I was thinking. I did not negate what you said. As a matter of fact, I opened up space for us to both move forward in some amazing energy. I totally hear what you're saying. So I'm not discount, and here's what I think I didn't say, [00:30:00] but I didn't say to you. No, I didn't stop the conversation.

I didn't stop the movement. I opened it. and that especially for brand new and, and you know, early journey entrepreneurs, like that's essential. This is something that will serve you beautifully cuz you'll just grow in it. Just those really strategic words, swaps. Yes. Okay. Noted more stuff for me to work on,

Thank you. I appreciate You're welcome. You've got an amazing resource for us that, that goes back to the mental rehearsal. Can you tell us a little bit about it? Yes. So this is a downloadable guided. Mental rehearsal meditation. So when I talked about the well form outcome, that's your homework to use this piece, know who you want to be, know what the outcome is and let it be tangible for you.

Start small, start with water. Start with word swapping , but for, and like [00:31:00] start small. So that you can practice and build that self-esteem and build that self-confidence. So I will walk you through all the pieces you come with the well formed outcome, and I'm gonna guide you in how to taste it and smell it and hear it, and feel it and see yourself showing up in it.

And it's about 12 minutes long. Totally worth it. Yes, you can do it first thing in the morning. Yes, you can do it at the end of the day like it. When your brain's in theta is the best time, which is when you very first wake up, however, there's never a bad time to start rewiring your. All right, perfect. Now we're gonna put the, the link for that in the show notes.

If you're on a platform where you cannot see show notes, you can always go to our website, which is one step empire.com, just the name of the podcast, and we'll have the link there. We'll have a link to Mindy's site so you can check out more about what she does. And of course, all the other episodes are there as well.

So I just wanna say thank you, honestly, so many. You know, gold nuggets through this whole [00:32:00] conversation. I think there's gonna be a lot of aha moments out there. I know I had a few, so thank you so much for being with us today, Mindy, thank you. Thank you. I truly, it is my passion to serve women, to be a champion for them, and I am obsessed with helping them rewire their brains.

So I know this was the perfect catalyst to get them started. So thank you.